Choked

The longing light kissed my feet

And the shadows got darker,

On the road of reckoning

My steps were reluctant as ever.

 

I gazed frantically around

Trying to retain the dream,

To burn every last detail

And forever commit to memory.

 

It remains forever in my vision

But I don’t look it in the eye,

As the salty matters threaten then

A trigger to the blurred goodbyes.

Dislikes

I dislike partings...

For they make me so sad

They make me want to reach out...

Reach out to what’s not there.

They leave me all alone

With nobody but myself.

 

I dislike loneliness...

It reminds me of times it wasn’t so

When I had everyone around

Who never made me feel alone.

And then the emptiness stings

And I’m left struggling with me.

 

I dislike absence...

It leaves empty spaces

Where earlier there was none

My heart keeps yearning for those not there

It calls out... but there are none.

There aren’t even echoes to

Answer me now... only the blank.

 

I dislike silence...

It opens too many doors

Rather left unopened

It brings back too many memories

That are better off untold.

Unsaid, mum and in the box

Never again to be taken out.

 

I dislike memories...

May they be big or small

For I don’t like going back in time

To relive that moment

And then pine...

For things I shouldn’t think of

However they might be.

 

I dislike thoughts...

Those traitors my brain pets

Who just betray my will...

They don’t listen one bit to me

And then the salt goes over the sill.

Madly Drunk

I want you to hold my hand

I want you to talk

Into my ear softly so

Only I can listen.

 

I want you to hold me close

Be with me evermore

Take me to the land of dreams

Where you and I can be.

 

Let’s run away

Let’s leave this world

And the customs it forces to bear

I just want to be with you

To hear your deep voice

And never know any fear.

 

Of being alone

Of being trapped

Of being without anyone

Of being closed off

Without you

Without you, oh my sun.

 

Your smile brings smiles to me

Your happiness radiance to my face

I need you so

Please love me so

I’ll be with you forever and a day.

I... Who?

* I have put it as a picture to retain the format.

Part of something else... but apt for now

The wistful loneliness doesn't go away
Like a shadow to you
Night time blues and sleeplessness
And thoughts with sadness brew.

Oh, why can't we be together
Why didn't the time start
'Tis right to live in hope, but now
There seems very little about.

There is a feeling of uncertainty
Threatening to call a storm
Kicked out dreams and goals and passions
And none of the glory of the morn.

Phase V Out

Moonlight flickers in
Through the greens’ sprightly dance,
Gets a glimpse of a shell
Where some ideas flow, perchance.

When once it felt such a face
That reflected light from within
Happy thoughts and their like
Full, up to the brim.
A reminder of togetherness
And soft dreams of romance
Warm feelings it once aroused
That now steadily wanes.

Now etched in features revealed
Are sadness and despair
Hope dried up in the heart
And left without a care.

But the light is still the same
Unique and unblemished
It washes its given pain
Seals the shell with a gentle kiss.

Wrapping up this sojourn
Off, on a brand new path
To discover and follow the hearts’ destiny
The inner voice... the lodestar.

The Aftermath

A gnawing pain fills my heart
Spilling water up-front,
Simple words put together
And I’m left to face their brunt.
Of all the good times I had
Only a few recollections remain,
So many things remind me
That nothing’s ever the same.
A walk here, some numbers there
And all the talk exchanged,
Everything said and done
Left nothing in the end, but pain.
Sleep isn’t that inviting anymore
The moon just gives plain light,
The cool air that’s in the trees
Takes with it my light.
Now, I’ve understood not to expect
Not to give too much to one,
Spare no extra thought at all
Let live and live on.

Untitled

Sitting with my back to the door
Pressed for warmth and a hug,
Trying to kiss my tears goodbye
Trying to hide a little shrug.

The creases don’t iron out
The folds don’t stay neat anymore,
I try to maintain the stacks proper
I try to keep the smell intact.

The lights die out slowly
I become like a distorted shadow,
Trying to retain the little mystique
Trying not to see the ghosts.

The melodies haunt my ears
Getting entangled with my moods,
I try to reach out and touch them
I try to feel, hold and love them.

The words are stuck on my tongue
And the sight in my eyes,
But to give up and let it go
Perhaps, I can only try.

Senses Underground

The day has dawned bright

And the melody begins to rise,

Up on higher like an arc, as

Pure a crescendo as the light.

 

So- the music rises in my soul

But haunting me always,

Like the delicate chime in the wind

Or maybe a distant goal.

 

___

 

The mellow aroma of the reds,

The naughty rose teases me,

Softly as a petal brushes

Come on now gently.

 

The perfume lingers on

A soft reminder, a smile,

And in a secret that endures

Within the petals entwined.